Fuck you Verizon!

I got sucked into the monopoly that Verizon Wireless has created in Upstate New York. Their in-calling network is possibly the greatest idea a company in their position could have created. The effect created is that the more users you have, the more value your product has. I learned some name for this in a Management Information Systems class, but was too fucking high to remember what it was called. Basically, each new subscriber adds more value to their "network."

The reason people join is because it ends up being so cheap, since everyone in upstate has Verizon, you'll never pay an overage. While that's all good, great, and grand, something doesn't seem quite right with it. I guess you can look at it as a win-win, consumers save money, Verizon makes more. The problem is their policy is turning them into a monopoly in certain regions, and the last I checked, unless you're Microsoft, you can't really do that.

The other big issue I have with those fuckers is that they were trying to screw me. I get my first month's bill in the mail, and there are two copies. I am thinking to myself, "maybe one for my records, one I have to mail back in." That would be somewhat intelligent, other than the waste of paper. What actually happened was that I received a bill - FOR A NUMBER THAT I DON'T EVEN HAVE! What the fuck???? So now I am gonna have to waste 30 minutes of my time arguing with them that I only have ONE PHONE, ONE NUMBER, and ONE BILL!

The fake number bill was for something like $117, and the real bill, for the phone I actually possessed and used, was for $59. I talk to about three idiots at Verizon, all really fucking confused and making up bullshit reasons why this situation happened. One of them actually told me that I would have to pay the $117!!! How fucking stupid do you think I am?? Finally someone told me that they would credit my account, this and that, and I wouldn't receive another faulty bill.

Fast forward one month exactly...

I go out to get the mail - what do you know? Two motherfucking bills! So I open them, thinking maybe the fake one will be zeroed out or something. I was so fucking wrong - now the fake bill is for $210!!! They decided that since it was unpaid, I had to pay late fees, government surcharges, and who the fuck knows what else. So once again, I am forced to call them up. I get the same story, the same waste of time, and the same sense that - they are gonna fuck up again.

Go yet another month forward...

I get the two bills in the mail. This time they told me that the fake one would be zeroed out and shit would be good. I open it, knowing that they probably fucked up, and you know what? THEY FUCKED UP AGAIN!!! This time the bill was closing in on $300! I am getting used to this ritual now, call Verizon and debate/argue each month on or around the 10th. So this time I get to talk to some higher up person who claims that they will personally address my issue.

One last month forward...

So this month I get my bill: -$171.89!! Somehow Verizon now owes me $170!! Woohoo!! I soon realize that they will never pay me this amount; instead, I will continue to receive a fake monthly bill, and they will always make sure it is negative or zeroed. Great fucking job, Verizon!! Why not just delete the fucking account - it doesn't exist. Fucking morons.

So with all said and done, I spent close to two hours on the phone with them, not only wasting my time, but wasting the minutes I purchase from them. I think it is some kind of conspiracy, for Verizon to fuck up so I need to waste my minutes correcting their mistakes.

Fuck you Verizon